Fifteen years ago today Kelley and I got married. We wore white dresses (I had to wear long sleeves because of the horrible track marks on my arms, from a recent IV treatment). Friends and family came from all over the US and the UK to witness our exchange of vows in our Atlanta garden. Most of them were frightened. Would we make them do bizarre ritual stuff? Would we engage in, y’know, Lesbian Things in public?
Strange to think same-sex weddings were so new back then that our guests were nervous. But we were the first s-s couple to be announced in the Atlanta Journal Constitution. We were the first to register at Macy’s (and, oh, there’s a story to that…). One good thing about making it all up as we went along: we did the whole thing–food, flowers, dresses, champagne–for $500 (and a lot of help from our friends).
Here’s us a few minutes after the vows:
That thing sticking up from the bottle is a teaspoon. It helps keep the fizz in the champagne. And here’s one of the obligatory ring shots (with cake in the background):
I could write a whole essay about that day (and the days preceding, and the days following) but for now I think I’ll just bask in the glory of it, the memory of saying to Kelley, “I will be strong, and brave, and fierce for you, no matter what.” No Matter What is engraved on the inside of our wedding rings.
Oh, and just for grins, here’s a picture of us taken two months ago, on our 20th anniversary (yep, we have lots o’ anniversaries and celebrate each one with gusto). Despite the fact we’d been eating and drinking for about seven hours at this point (gusto, remember, gusto), I think we look pretty good for an old married couple.
27 thoughts on “fifteen years ago today”
You both look and ARE wonderful. Thanks for sharing this memory with us. I’m all warm and fuzzy now. I look forward to the day Esmeralda and I get to say, “Fifteen years ago today…” Wow. Congratulations. And more thanks and happiness to you both.
You two are so beautiful together.>>Congratulations on 15 years, and here’s to an uncountable number more!
This is certainly more joyous and hopeful than a discussion of Obama/McCain :). Congratulations and many more years of continued happiness.
Thanks for sharing your beautiful relationship with us. Long life to you both.
Sheesh, you guys have hardly aged at all! You two look beautiful. You gave me the warm fuzzies this morning! >>Today is your fifteenth or twentieth anniversary?>>Congratulations!
I can see the sheer joy and happiness on your face in your wedding day picture. Thank you for sharing your special day with all of us.>>Many, many, many more years of happiness to you both!
I’m highly proud to say I was there and that I wasn’t nervous about anything except making an ass of myself in front of your friends and family, particularly after a few mimomas and then mead. Oy. >>It was a wonderful day and probably the best and sweetest wedding I’ve ever attended (outside of my own of course.) You both were and are beautiful women who could not possibly be more dear to me.
Beautiful. Congratulations. The look on your face Nicola, when you are looking at Kelley right after the vows is priceless.
karina, so what was your wedding like?>>janine, thank you.>>rory, oh yep. I won’t even talk about the politics of marriage. Not today. Today we’re having a splendid breakfast, an hour in the park, a massage, and going out for dinner to a local Italian place. Yum.>>evecho, how can I not share? I’m so proud that Kelley loves me.>>sypscribbler, today is the 15th annivesary of our wedding. In june, it was the 20th anniversary of first meeting. In December it will be the 19th annivesary of living together.>>patti, thank you. I think there will be many, many more years ahead–if an asteroid doesn’t hit the earth or anything like that.>>dave, thank you for being there. Thank you for helping to roll out the bright blue tarps to stop the recently laid sod floating away on a river of mud. Thanks for witnessing our vows and being our friend. And hug Darlene for us.>>jennifer, oh, I can’t tell you how happy I was to have got through the whole thing without something disastrous happening. It was astonshing how…huge the whole day felt. There’s something truly life-changing about swearing a vow in front of 50 of one’s closest people. It means something.
It was September 7 and sunny. The ceremony took place in the rose garden at Stanley Park. Esmeralda had been crying on and off during the first days of September, whenever we talked about our vows and stuff. I had expected she’d be that way during the ceremony, but she got an attack of the giggles instead. It was a happy day. I’ll upload some photos and send you a link. :-)
Cool. So what number is your anniversary on Sunday?
The third. Which is strange, since I feel we’ve known and loved each other much much longer than that.
Congratulations! Thank you so much for sharing your pictures, the love you two share shines through. My wife and I will celebrate 4 years married on October 30th. Many wishes for a very long and happy life together!
CONGRATULATIONS!>>How beautiful and happy you both look, then and now. Reading this post got me all teary.>>My husband and I just celebrated our 16th wedding anniversary and 20th anniversary together. Not same-sex, but love is love.>>Here’s to many more years of conjugal bliss! *clink*
That’s cool. Thanks for sharing that moment in time. Warm and funny is appreciated. You both seem to be glowing through this aging process. >>While Janet and I have celebrated 21 years we have never done the marriage thing. This year I even asked Janet to run away to California and mary me! She said “No.” Not quite sure what to make of that. But at least she still lives here.>>That spoon in the champaigne is a neat trick.>>Our people need to here more about couples like you and Kelly. Congrats on doing the marriage thing in the first place, and on 15years!>>duff
karina, third? Excellent. By now you should know exactly what you signed up for :) It’s weird, isn’t it, that time-telescope thing? Even more weirdly, it changes (for me/us) from year to year. This year our meeting and wedding seem like things that happened on another planet. Last year they felt like yesterday. Next year, who knows?>>alisa, many congrats in advance.>>stephanie, oh yes, love is love, to be celebrated as much as possible. Congrats to you both.>>duff, is Janet waiting for the federal thing or is travelling to California just too much hassle?
Wow great pictures thanks for sharing those and your story. You both are somewhat my secret guilty pleasure for coupledom. Few people ever make that area for real but that’s just the thing see is that you’re for real. I’m toasting you both with a lovely dark coffee porter from the Midnight Sun Brewery. I hope you have many more years together doing whatever it is that’s working so well.>>Oh and it was really nice to see you both then and now.>>I always forgot my I.D. for this site so I’ll sign here, Sly
Ain’t marriage grand?>>May you have many more years together!
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sly, cheers.>>ssas, yes, it’s grand. Better than I ever imagined it could be.>>linda, you’re welcome, but, ooof, I dunno, never like the thought of those silver hooks…
Well, my apologies for the “hooks”, LOL, and apology as well to Marlowe…>>I guess I interpreted the sentiment far differently than intended…ouch!>>Nevertheless…cheers to many more years!
Thank you, Nicola, for sharing. I wish you both more of the happiness and love that you’ve been able to enjoy the past 15 (or 20!) years.
I’d done the three-year thing before, but it’s the first time it feels absolutely right and effortless (of course there’s work involved, like in every relationship, but it’s not a chore). >>Time-telescope… Yes, back in my teens two years seemed like a lifetime. Now they go by so fast. And sometimes my perception scrambles all my memories into a goop without chronology.>>We’ll see how close or far your meeting and wedding seems next year. :-)
linda, well, it was pretty difficult looking my trout in the eye last night–but then, hey, I just ate it. And it was delicious.>>diane, thank you. I think we have decades and decades of fabulousness ahead, and I intend to enjoy every drop of it.>>karina, well, my first gf lasted a year and a half, my second relationship was nearly eleven years, and this one 20 yrs so far (this one will last til one of us drops dead). The long-term thing really works for me.
Better late than never, I guess: many many many happy anniversaries together and may the sun always shine on you two! You’re beautiful together.
Thanks, horia. The sun is certainly shining at the moment. We’ve had absolutely luscious weather here the last week.
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