No, I know it’s not Friday. But I didn’t do one last week. I didn’t forget. I’d planned to cut a slice from a live Janes Plane show I pulled from a cassette but when I heard it–for the first time in twenty years–it was so unremittingly horrible I just couldn’t bear to share any part if it. I think it was the worst gig we ever did. It was recorded at a club in Hull and I was ill: I had to leave the stage every few minutes to throw up. Ugh. And the drum kit kept breaking. And Jane’s guitar wouldn’t stay in tune. And, and, and. It just sucked.
Carol and I had just spent a few days at the UK equivalent of Michigan Womyn’s Music Festival, where the food was vile and the hygiene even worse. But the women were, y’know, right there, and in festive mood; there was lots o’ music, lots o’ drugs. I didn’t get much sleep. Anyway, we got back to Hull minutes before going on stage. I don’t think we even had time for a sound check. Everyone was mad at us. But I felt so awful I didn’t care. You can hear the utter despair in my voice. Actually, you can’t; you never will; I will not allow another living being hear that recording. Ever.
So here, instead, is another song from long ago: me and Jane doing a cover of Velvet Underground’s “After Hours.” (Yep, another boombox recording.) For whatever reason, this strikes me as a perfect way to end 2008. (This version is, anyway–it’s much more up-tempo than VU’s original.) Enjoy.
http://www.nicolagriffith.com/audio/player.swf
(direct link)
So how will you be spending your New Year’s Eve? Every year Kelley and I buy the best bottle of champagne we can afford, settle down in front of the fire, and talk about the year that was and the year to come. We laugh (sometimes cry) about our experiences of the last twelve months, then get to the serious business of laying out goals. They’re not small things, not Resolutions such as ‘I want to lose 10lbs’, they’re more like: I will do the fucking work or I will remember I don’t always have to win. Then we promise to help each other with those goals, and then we eat an enormous dinner. (Often it’s Indian food, but this year I think I’ll make a spaghetti bolognese and a lot of garlic bread–Kelley loves it.)
I hope you all have a wonderful beginning to your year. May 2009 bring exactly the amount of excitement you desire.
Nicola Griffith 
What is the UK equivalent of MichFest? I can't help but only think of MichFest as a trans exclusionary space, & wonder about its peers.
One action I’ve found that allows winning to be highly probable is to define “winning” differently. Looking at the world as a laboratory and each interaction as an experiment almosteliminates “losing.” There are no losers in an experiment, just opportunities to learn. Of course, some interactions are harder to define as winners than others. But with time passed as a healing agent, even those experiences can become winners.Best to you and Kelley in this coming year!
Oops! forgot to sign that last post.Duff
I love that. Thanks. Hard to believe the other recording was <>that<> bad…Sounds like the perfect way to bring in the new year.Here’s to a great 2009 for all of us.
Yours and Kelley’s traditions sound deliciously romantic. And “sucky shows” is what the punk rock is all ABOUT. I MUST find a way to give listen to this masterpiece of sorts!!!
mordicai it was (I stress the tense–we’re talking 25 yrs ago) in Somerset. I don’t remember what it was called. But I’m pretty sure it was before all the exclusionary crap that developed in the mid-80s in the US. I have never understood why oppressed people like to maintain a hierachy of oppression/exclusion.duff, I think a lot of winning is about getting the last word. I’m not interested in that. I like to think of a discussion as going on and on. A really good one goes on through others, on into the future, on through other media. It’s the stuff of life, in a way. I was brought up to be competitive but find I don’t like it much. Unless challenged, of course, in which case it’s ‘I will grind you into the dust!’ (I never said I wasn’t contradictory…)jennifer, oh, yes, yes it was.realmcovet, no, no you won’t ever get to hear it. No no no.
Weirdly enough I don't know very much about the queer scene in the UK 25 years ago.Oh & I don't know from traditions, yet. Last year Jenny & I had two people over; one slept in the bathtub, another slept on the bathroom floor (one was making sure the other didn't Hendrix) & I THINK I slept naked on the couch…for no good reason. Then the next day the bathroom sleepers became a couple.This year we are having maybe 12-15 people over. I just bought stupid hats. We (we = Jenny) are making pizza. There are a million bottles of champagne (well, Prosecco) & wine et al to be distributed. I can't be sure how the social mix will gel.
thanks for your wishes…i like the contemplative part of your yearly review and next year’s planning in partnership, followed by food and drink you love. sounds wonderful. -sarah
Hope that everyone here has a Healthy and Happy New Year. We were going out to dinner and a movie but we are getting hit with a howling snow storm, so now we are trying to order in something before all the restaurants shut down.I don’t usually care what we do on New Year’s Eve, so as long as I am not surrounded by crazy, drunk lunatics :)
mordicai, sounds as though you know how to throw a party :)sarah, yes, it’s usually one of my favourite evenings of the year.rory, oof, I know what you mean. I got beaten up and put in hospital one New Year’s eve. People can lose their marbles.
Just a passing thought there is a time to work and a time to eat spagetti and garlic bread and slurp down some good wine. Enjoy the New Year and most of all do what’s important to you while blessing everybody eles’s path.Thanks for following on tweet!John Young
Nicola,I hope you and Kelley enjoy your festivities! We are going dancing with friends at the Century Ballroom. I shall raise my glass to include you :).
juan, thank you, and welcome to the blog.jill, Happy New Year to you and your sweetie. I hope you have a brilliant evening, and many more of the same for 2009.
I spent New Year’s Eve putting < HREF="http://shetranslates.com/2008/dreamcatcher-city/" REL="nofollow">a mashup vid<> together. Now I’ll go Rock Band with E until 2009 starts. I can say that your cover is way better than the ones we’ll be pretending to play tonight. Cheers and Happy New Year to you all!
Yay, a new mashup!
When I hear your voice, I know you loved to sing. You and Jane had a special musical bond that we can hear, even recorded on an old boom box. I’m glad you saved some of it.