Today is our double wedding anniversary.
Photo by Mark Tiedemann
Image description: Colour photo of two white women’s hands wearing new gold bands, touching. White background with flowers out of focus.
On September 4, 1993 we got married in our back yard in Atlanta surrounded by family and friends from various countries. It had no legal force, but great emotional power. We took it very seriously: we were the first same-sex couple to register at Macy’s the first to be announced in the Atlanta Journal-Constitution (and believe me, I have stories about both firsts). We thought it would be our only wedding.
Then, on the 25th anniversary of me and Kelley meeting, the Supreme Court of the United States struck down DOMA and same-sex marriage became real overnight.
Two months later, on September 4, 2013 we got married for the second and final time right here in Seattle. This time we had a judge.
Now we wear two rings:
Photo by Jennifer Durham
Image description: Black and white photo of one white woman using two hands to enfold the hand of another. Both are wearing two gold bands on their ring finger; the outer rings are new and shining.
Nicola Griffith 
Congratulations to you both!
Sent from my iPhone
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Lovely! My partner and I will be married this October 30 – our 24th anniversary of our meeting. We wanted a judge to perform the private ceremony but here in KC MO, municipal judges don’t do weddings probably so as to avoid any publicity of turning down a same sex couple. Today we picked up our rings and are looking forward to the protections that a legal marriage affords all couples!
Congratulations and best wishes for continued happiness. Thank you for your writing and for your courage. You are a star in my mental firmament.
Congratulations!
@Terry: Thank you!
@DCinKC: Picking up the rings felt huge to me–in a good way. I hope your wedding goes beautifully.
@Jessie: Thank you. Sometimes I’ve had to be courageous, but honestly often it’s just a questions of ‘Huh. I want that. I’m going to find a way to get it.’ Bloody-mindedness maybe?
@robertreynolds: Thank you.
Happy Anniversary!
Wish we could have been there for the second one, but the memory of the first is priceless. Love to you both.
Congratulations
@Glenda: Is that you? From Clarion ’88??
@Mark: Ah, me too. But it was such a last-minute thing. And thank you again for all the photos you took that first time. It’s always lovely, though sad, to see my mother and sister there, happy and healthy.
Love is grand but full of responsibilities.
@OldGymRat: Eh, most of life is.
I know you know this Nicola. I’m just squeaking here to keep people thinking. Good on you!
Congratulations. Is so beautiful.
Got you beat by two years and four days :)
This post is a lovely reminder that you and others had to fight for what my wife and I take for granted, for no reason other than being who you are. It’s also a reminder, amidst all the present ugliness in the US, Australia and elsewhere, about what marriage equality really is – two people committing themselves to each other. No different from my wife and me.
Congratulations.
@REAndeen: Thanks. One of the hardest things about not being able to be legally married was the immigration process. Years of stress, three sets of lawyers, and $20,000 for what, for a straight couple, would have been the time to fill in a form, and $75. I had to make new law to be with the woman I love. I know that the stories always demand the suitor prove their love before they get the princess but, damn, that seemed excessive! Worth it, though, of course. I would do it again in a heart beat. It’s just that now I wouldn’t have to, which makes me smile for those applying now.
Good on you Nicola!
Congratulations!